Wonder Mum

Since I've started writing again, I've come to the conclusion that for me, writing really is like breathing for my soul. The sense of calm and relief I feel and possess when I write is transformative compared to when I don't. I'm happier.  In all things.  All of the time.  It's like having a superpower that transcends all aspects of my life. Taking the time to write is in itself taking time to treat myself with a kindness I would usually only reserve for others. Like a soul-spa.  It cleanses and renews. It enables me to cut through the top 'chaos-layer' and reveal what sits underneath.  It's a way to cut out the noise and focus in on what's really true and what really matters. I get perspective too.  So if things are troubling or emotive, writing gives me the opportunity to 'talk it out' on the page and make sense of it all.  I am always clear by the time I'm done.  I know why I feel the way I do and what action I need to take...

Yesterday was a really lovely day.  I'm pretty sure that's the first time since Lockdown started that I've said that.  And it's rained all day! It's come at a really good time as we have just received a call to say Cub has been added to the UK's vulnerable list - which basically means we need to take extra measures to ensure he remains home and is 'shielded' from the virus by all of us. So to have a good day was important as we may be facing Lockdown for a lot longer than everyone else. I asked myself what it was that made it good and I realised we had no cross words, no raised voices, and we did all of the important things. Then it struck me.  We got up at the normal time and the kids actually went to bed a little later than usual (as we kept them up to Clap for Carers at 8pm) and yet we had only done the things that had real value.  Family value.  We had not pushed ourselves to complete loads of school work and I had not completed any paid work...

I vaguely remember making cakes with my Mum when I was tiny.  I had this plastic kids mixer you could beat one egg in at a time.  From memory it was the best thing ever as it looked like a stand up mixer and it worked with a turn handle. So my memories of 'helping Mummy' make cakes were fond. My Mother remembers is slightly differently!  She says she used to dread the 'sound of the chair' which meant I was dragging the kitchen stool across the floor to get to her and that meant I was about to interrupt whatever stage she was at ;) While I can relate as cooking with kids is a whole different ball game, I think baking with kids is great!  They get SO much from it and they have absolutely NO IDEA whether your bakes are any good or not (depending how young they are when you start!) It's no surprise then that I started baking with my daughter when she was still one!  I used to put a line of chairs up in the then 'old kitchen' and she could walk along the si...

Time is really tight for me as I'm sure it is for lots of us. And yet still I have the desire to keep writing my blog, having only recently rediscovered it. It's not that I haven't missed it.  I have.  I've just been so busy 'doing life' that by the time the end of the day comes, I am so thoroughly exhausted, there is just no energy left for me to even contemplate opening up the laptop again! So what has changed? Well my youngest is a little older and so that means a more regular and predictable bedtime routine. He is also in much better health as he was very poorly for a while which will no doubt be another post for another day.  This means once he goes to bed now, he sleeps and is not waking up frankly projectile vomiting (exorcist-style) across his bedroom, needing medicine, cuddles, re-settling, new clothes, new bedding, and a 'wipe-down' of the walls and or carpet! He also is not having to have interventions such as 4 hourly meds day...

Day Sleep Day 2 and WOW, what a difference!! Littlest just went off to sleep no problem and stayed asleep for a whopping one and a half hours giving me a much needed  break! I managed to write an entire blog post and start sorting our kitchens.  Yes we are back to kitchens...! We even started some Cub-Friendly Cookies (littlest has allergies), much to his delight when he awoke as he loves the dough (more than the actual cookies!) I also got some valuable time with the others which has never really happened since youngest Cub was born.  He has had one health battle after another in his early years and as such, has required much more attention than I expected.  Especially for a third child.  This child most certainly did not  'just fit in'. I also benefitted hugely  from having a little time off.  Don't get me wrong, I still rushed around sorting things, clearing up, re-loading the dishwasher, cleaning, changing over washing and so on, as ...

We have been in Corona Lockdown for 5 weeks and the cracks are starting to show.  Work does seem to have calmed down a little, which is a blessing, however not so for Mr Big.  So where some wives/partners are no doubt going out of their minds with their husbands/partners suddenly being 'locked home' with them, Mr Big disappears out to the office, pops back for lunch, then disappears again until his usual home time. Well, most of the time...and I have really tried  to ensure he can  do that, by meeting everyone's perpetual and consistent gazillion needs a day, so he can be left to just focus on his work... ...however, yesterday was no ordinary day and yours truly had just about had enough! I could sustain it no more.  The pressure valve burst.  AKA Mummy had a mahoosive meltdown!! I think we all reach a breaking point and mine was in most spectacular fashion.  We seemed to have an inversely proportional relationship between my levels of patience...

Well this is a post I never expected to be writing! We are currently mid-lockdown in the UK having started our own isolation a little early as we thought we may have been exposed. So we went into lockdown of our own from 18th March. I truly never thought in my lifetime I would see a time where flights stopped, schools were closed, all public places were off limits, police were tasked with breaking up gatherings of more than 2 and to ensure people only embarked on essential travel, and we were not really allowed to leave our homes other than for exercise! And yet here we are!  And really oddly, we seem to be adjusting to this 'new normal'. I'm not sure what's more terrifying!  That it took an 'invisible enemy' to lock down the world.  That this happened so quickly.  Or that we have adapted so fast? In the UK we are lucky as we have the NHS which is doing a superb job.  We also have a government with deep enough pockets they have offered a tonne of support...